Look at the time..And I'm suppose to wake up early
tomorrow..I mean today.........

This is going to be fun..CNY without the worry of the
nonsense called homework.How many of us are
actually giving a damn about the work in the first place.
Oh yea,today is Friday.Just merely 4 more days til
they day uniform will be our attire for 6 hours.

Anyone who forgot about school or even homework.
2 thumbs up.I salute thee..


I'm going to bed.Good night...


..and the time strike 4.34am when I cllick publish post..

It's damn nice reading the past messages.
You'll be shock with things you can say.Surprised !
The happy moments all saved in a conversation log.
The sad times revived by the log.But overall,
it's still a laughing matter.The foolishness in your own
words that you will never notice,the potential hurtful
sentences you wish never been told.

Or sometimes,you wish you said something different.
Ever wondered about the result?What might this happen
or will this even happen?Reading and thinking while
losing in Blackjack!!!

I'm sure you have heard many times.Don't drink and drive.
I think for me the best would surely be..
Don't think and drive.
I saw my entire life flashes right in front
of my life.Obviously I'm still fine since I am still typing
this post.

Longing for the day.
The day I could put on a genuine smile.
The day I could proudly say
"This Is Who I Really Am !"

I'm glad I felt the way before.
Will there be anyone else who can make me
feel the same way?

Look at the time this post is up...
Wtf right??Damn early for Chinese New Year first
day.I was expecting all night gambling and end up
everyone went home early...This is so different than
year or the year before.First time my CNY ended
this early.

Maybe it's a good thing.Some screwed up CNY I had.
Sore throat,runny nose,cough and slight fever.I hardly
put anything into my mouth.I guess I'm not going to
gain any weight this year....

I'm sick.I'm tired.What else?As if my life isn't hard
enough.I guess that is all I gotta write.Lazy.Drunk.
I just hope I can get better so that I can enjoy more
of this CNY.Chiaoz.

It's been a while since I felt alive.Everything seems clear
to me now.I had been very,I mean very very confused.
My feelings gone haywire.I couldn't think rationally.I
abandon so much things,throwing away so much more.
I drown myself in games,television so I can keep running
away from the truth.Oh I forgot,'sleep'.So much thing I don't
wanna face.

But that was few month ago.I made myself a ticking time bomb.
Temper like shit.Anti-social.Dunno what else to name.Too
many fucked up nonsense I made myself to.

Sad to say,it took one tragic event to make me realise the black
cloud surrounding me.He put me in a different position.He gave
me a new point of view.A new life.I missed him.I loved him.My
deepest regret,I din get to see him one last time when he was in
the hospital.

Some fucked up 3 months I gone thru.At least now everything is
fine.Although I lost people dearest to me,I got so outdated on
what's happening.But I feel I'm a lot better than before.At least
I dare to write this damn post which cost me few drops of tears.

I'm sorry to those I hurt during the holz and thank you so much
for those who cared about me.I didn't reply your messages I'm
sorry but I appreciate it very much.So thank you.

p.s. feel free to prasan since names are not mention
p.p.s.Happy Chinese New Year !
p.p.p.s.Im signing off.Toodlez.

Time has been harsh to everyone of us.As time pass,things fade.
Until nothing was left.The joy we use to have,slowly becomes only
a memory.The freedom we use to have was long lost as time pass.
Now the only thing we can do,open our dear hands and welcome
stress and misery into our life.Life is definately not fair.Some might
able to live in the presence,some forever stuck in the pass.A simple
mistake made,lives deep in our heart.Surfacing every now and then
causing guilt.

Its practically impossible to not feel regret.Actions of our past.The
idiocy we had always find a way to haunt us,sooner or later.And when
it does,it actually stays very long.Could be months.It all takes courage
and heart to overcome it.(Sadly some characteristic im lacking)Will
things be the same if humans have just bulk up the courage to correct
things that we did in the past?Will now the present be any different.

Ignoring signs,messages could be fatal.A sign of hope could mean so
much more than u expect only if you choose to accept it.Things
could go different,very different.But who knows how it might be.Its
like choosing at a forked road.There no way of knowing where the
other road lead.Choosing one means thats it.Other people now has
the same opportunity and losing one means that's it.GAME OVER!

Lies.The most hurtful aspect.Needless more comment,it sucks.Just one
lie and this is where you stand today.Dire consequences.

I know now,many things I screwed up in the past.It haasnt been the same.
Although I hope it could be.The scar of the past will forever remain.
Chances doesn't come often and I let it slip pass me.It took me some
time but now I could say.FUCK the past.Mistakes have been done.
Things cant be change.The search for that tiny sparkle light of hope
continue but it surely difficult.Chances of finding it could be like chances
of snowing in Malaysia.

I'm sorry for all the dumb things I had done.And thank you
for the chances you have given me in the past.I am who
I am now.Finally a better person.

Good bye.